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I couldn’t say that I simply wouldn’t marry; but it wasn’t meant to be. Although I didn’t get married, I can’t say I was as innocent as a nun, because I did have my share of relationships, more or less. I am a very difficult person and I admit that things would have been easier for me if I hadn’t been so picky. I wanted to have someone to talk to, I didn’t care about the material aspects, and I rarely came across someone who had any idea about music and who didn’t sneer if we went to a concert or an opera performance, or if we just talked about music. I didn’t meet too many boys like this.
The ones I got close to marry were all Jews, because mothers used to talk to one another and there were the matchmakers too. There were matchmakers in Bucharest, and Timisoara, and they even had catalogues with the Jewish bachelors. This is how one found a boy in those days. I had suitors from Timisoara, from Bucharest, from Botosani. There was a suitor from Petrosani to whom I even became engaged; but that was all. This is how things happened.
Now I’m sorry I didn’t get married – there must have been someone among all those suitors who would have been good for me. They all liked me, but I didn’t really like any of them. I don’t know what was in my head at that time, but I wouldn’t do it again. Although those seemed to be acceptable matches, I’m not sure a marriage would have lasted. Time erodes a relationship and both spouses have to be diplomats. They must communicate, in order for each of them to understand what the other wants. I put my faith in my destiny.
First of all, I really wanted to be with my mother; I had my sister in Craiova indeed, but she was married. I was also a nurse, and I had to stay close to my mother, because she was getting old. I always had an important condition for all my suitors: either to let my mother stay with us, or to live at her place. I wouldn’t have it any other way, and none of my suitors was enthusiastic about this.
The ones I got close to marry were all Jews, because mothers used to talk to one another and there were the matchmakers too. There were matchmakers in Bucharest, and Timisoara, and they even had catalogues with the Jewish bachelors. This is how one found a boy in those days. I had suitors from Timisoara, from Bucharest, from Botosani. There was a suitor from Petrosani to whom I even became engaged; but that was all. This is how things happened.
Now I’m sorry I didn’t get married – there must have been someone among all those suitors who would have been good for me. They all liked me, but I didn’t really like any of them. I don’t know what was in my head at that time, but I wouldn’t do it again. Although those seemed to be acceptable matches, I’m not sure a marriage would have lasted. Time erodes a relationship and both spouses have to be diplomats. They must communicate, in order for each of them to understand what the other wants. I put my faith in my destiny.
First of all, I really wanted to be with my mother; I had my sister in Craiova indeed, but she was married. I was also a nurse, and I had to stay close to my mother, because she was getting old. I always had an important condition for all my suitors: either to let my mother stay with us, or to live at her place. I wouldn’t have it any other way, and none of my suitors was enthusiastic about this.
Period
Location
Romania
Interview
Cornelia Gatlan
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